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Post: As a Caddie, I Once Stole Money from an Older Gentleman
Top Comment: I wouldn't say this is stealing. This is just the other guy giving you a tip as well.
Post: I drugged a co-worker and he can't tell anyone
Top Comment: No one likes a W
Post: I stole $45,000 from my former employer and think I am morally justified
Top Comment: Why do you think people never investigate financial crimes? There is literally an entire field dedicated to finding it. Forensic accounting and auditing.
Post: I put peanut butter in my friend's drink thinking she was lying about her allergy.
Top Comment: Jesus Christ
Post: My first two tattoos on human skin (other than my own) were on two 13-year-old children (not mine)
Top Comment: This is the quality content I'm here for.
Post: I stole a lot of cigarettes from my dad.
Top Comment: I think most teenager smokers have done this. My nan was a secret(not so secret very badly hidden, who waters the plants at 10pm?!)smoker and we found her stash and would pinch one or two when we were round because we were skint then use our pocket money to randomly put a 10box back when we could.
When we were adults and my grandad passed she would smoke and we admitted to it she said she couldn't understand what was going on and thought it was my grandad just helping her lol. If he's still around and still smoking, buy him a box occasionally.
Post: I can get free McDonald’s meal any time without paying anything.
Top Comment: Don’t update the app
Post: My friend and I burned down a house when I was a kid
Top Comment: Shit this better be a alt account arson in some states has no statue of limitations
Post: Found $760. Didn’t return it even though i knew who lost it.
Top Comment: I had this happen once. I was mowing a friend's lawn for some extra money and found a wad of bills on the street. Turned out it was $1,000 even. I really needed the money at the time and I was really tempted to keep it, so I decided that if it was his I'd return it to him and if not it was mine now since I didn't know any of his neighbors or anything. Finished up the lawn and was chatting to him and he mentioned he was stressing because he'd withdrawn money for rent and then dropped it somewhere. I whipped it out of my pocket and made his day, but was a little bummed that I still had to come up with MY bills money.
Post: I told my school my mom died in Afghanistan. She then did a surprise visit on leave to the school.
Top Comment: Similar thing happened to me but the opposite way...
My mom died when I was 8 and word got around my elementary school and all the kids were asking me if it was true
I denied it. I said she was alive and that it was all made up. It was right around the time of mother day and I remember that the teacher had us making cards to give to our moms when one of my classmates said “ what about michael. His mom died “ and I jumped up and said “ no she’s not. She’s alive!”
After class my teacher pulled me aside and asked me why I was denying her death , I continued with the lie that she was alive until they called my dad to confirm that in fact she was dead
Looking back it’s extremely cringy to think about but just like in your situation Op, I think it was a coping mechanism that got out of hand
Post: I spiked the entire offices coffee supply with decaf coffee beans and told nobody.
Top Comment: Just don't do that the other way around. My dad drinks decalf because he has a heart condition and caffeine can kill him.
Post: I know that my husband has sex with other women.
Top Comment: Get yourself tested for STDs
Post: I’m a liar but only in one tiny, stupid regard. I say “I just woke up” all the time when I absolutely did not
Top Comment: This is almost entirely harmless, but it sounds like the root of it might be a lack of self confidence. Maybe you could give yourself a break and reframe seeng yourself "awkward" into natural or authentic.
Post: I threw mangoes on my neighbours house and it got all stained
Top Comment: I always knew it was you and your cousin! I’m on my way over to settle the score!
Post: We bribed a kid in our high-school to take the blame for an adult video cassette.
Top Comment: That's funny as shit! Back in those days, my brother got a "tape" stuck in the VCR, and had to shamefacedly take it to be repaired. He said when he picked it up, a couple people came out of the back of the shop to laugh at him.
He said the title of the tape was "Aunt Jemima spanks the naughty white boys", which I'm sure is made-up bullshit, but it WAS pretty funny, if horrifying by modern standards.
Post: I lied: I did give you the slice of pizza that dropped on the ground.
Top Comment: I got a laugh from the title but as I read on I just got sad. Sorry man.
Post: [No Regrets] I bought a rooster just to piss off my neigbors
Top Comment: 10/10 approve. As a flock owner I️ concur this an acceptable cock move ❤️
Post: I used a corporate "emergency" credit card for 3 years on small things for myself.
Top Comment: They keep shit like that in their back pocket to fire ur ass if they disapprove of your performance in the future
Post: When I was 11, my dad’s girlfriend’s 22 year old son used to regularly beat my dad up to a bloody pulp in-front of me. I’m 30 now, and I’m still haunted by it..
Top Comment: Holy fuck dude. So sorry to read this. Do you have an option to speak with a therapist to help you process this?
Post: I was mean to one of the only people who were nice to me in High School
Top Comment: Contact her and be honest with her like you did here.
Good luck.
Post: I was relieved when my ex cheated on me so I didn't have to stay in contact with their kid.
Top Comment: Does your current spouse want kids or is he just fond of them? I can't see the relationship lasting if it's the former.
Post: In High School I plagiarized a paper from the internet and submitted it via Turnitin.
Top Comment: I once plagiarized myself after suspecting my professor didn't read our papers. I didn't even change the date so I had plausible deniability of "accidentally printing the wrong file." I received an A 2 weeks in a row on the same paper.
Post: I work for an ice cream store. If a customer is rude, I purposely give them less than what they asked for or tell them we’re out of the topping they want even though I have more in the back.
Top Comment: That's honestly what they deserve. As long as you're not spitting in their ice cream or something like that
Post: In Year 12 I lied to my science teacher, saying I handed in an assignment that I never even started. I ended up getting a B+ on it.
Top Comment: Man, you are lucky! I handed a major assignment in, but the teacher made me re-do it because she had lost it lol. Now, I take pictures of everything to keep as evidence.
Post: As a kid, i stole military equipment from not so abandoned military base
Top Comment: This is 100% Eastern Europe.
Post: The first time I drove by myself after getting my license, I had a minor accident but never ever told anyone - not even the driver of the other car 👀.
Top Comment: That's actually really impressive tf
Post: I give away food when my managers not looking
Top Comment: Pro tip: Keep track of as much as you can and waste what you think should be recorded!
Most crew will hold off during busy hours and waste things later as to not waste time, get into the "habit" of doing this and just waste what you might give away. For example, for upgrading fries, maybe waste a medium or a large fry, say there were some that werent good anymore. Waste a few drink cups, they fell on the floor.
What they catch onto is things not being recorded, so if its accounted for in waste, not an issue! Unless this is too much of a hassle like if the managers keep waste sheets. We post ours for crew.
Post: When I'm pissed at my brother I dump small amounts of glitter on his bed.
Top Comment: [deleted]